


Can't Leave You Alone

by microphoneMessiah



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Humanstuck, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-30
Updated: 2012-07-30
Packaged: 2017-11-11 00:55:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/472672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/microphoneMessiah/pseuds/microphoneMessiah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>title comes from the song it's inspired by, "Leave You Alone".</p><p>Tavros has flashbacks to different moments in their relationship and ponders over where they'll go next.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Can't Leave You Alone

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Oxers](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oxers/gifts).



> _She said you ain’t no good but you feel so good_   
_She said I would if I could but I gotta leave you alone_   
_(She said) I gotta leave you alone I-I-I-I_   
_She said I know you bad, but I want you back…_

> Tavros lets himself fall back onto the bed, back hitting with a soft sigh and creak of the bed frame. His legs scratch a bit against the metal edge, but Gamzee’s lips are on him with such a force, that he can’t even manage to so much as mutter in pain. It’s all fire and lust and maybe he loves him more than he cares to think he does. 

He really isn’t sure anymore.

Gamzee’s hands are running up his sides, calloused and shaky from what Tavros suspects is guitar playing and shooting up. It’s still, somehow, kind of sweet in a way and the feel of it all has his shudder carrying out across the quiet room. He’s not even looking at Gamzee, eyes transfixed on the lamp by the bedside as Gamzee easily slides his legs over his to straddle him. He only looks up at him when he feels a hand palming the growing bulge in his pants, causing him to let out a quiet moan.

Gamzee’s hair is splayed across his face, sticking to his forehead and the side of his cheeks, wet. He had just gotten out of the shower when Tavros had gotten back from work. The first thing he did when he heard the familiar sound of the doorknob turning, clicking to a stop, was to scoop him into his arms and carry him there. Little drops of water fall from his face and onto Tavros. Tavros can’t even tell what the red eyes looking back at him mean anymore.

It’s all really blur as he tries to recall the different points of their relationship. The different ups and downs that had occurred along the way of them trying to find the way to forever in love. He feels his shirt being slid off before there’s a pair of hands tugging at his belt.

_“You know, I bet I could motherfucking make you smile.” A voice says from behind him. “Make that whole pretty face of yours light up. Bright as the fucking sun, even.”_

_Tavros whips around to see some man he doesn’t know. A man in a grey hoodie and faded jeans with a grin that knocks him senseless. He wipes the tears from his eyes to fix the other man with a scowl. “I doubt it, really. You don’t know what kind of shit I’ve just gone through.”_

_And then the man is walking over to him, taking a seat on the curb and gesturing for him to follow. Tavros hesitates for a moment, recalling his childhood years of being told not to talk to strangers, but then figures what’s one more bad deed in a life of wrongdoing? The man seems pleased that Tavros hasn’t left, grin slowly expanding millimeter by millimeter. “Everyone has rough shit in their lives, kid.” Their arms bump. “Just depends on what you make of it.”_

Tavros rocks his hips up, loud groans bouncing off the walls of the room as Gamzee sucks him off. His hands are pulling his hair like it’s the only thing that’ll keep him grounded; the only proof that this isn’t all just some dream. A bad dream? Fuck, he doesn’t know. All he knows is Gamzee’s lips around his dick and hot, hot wetness as a tongue sweeps across his slit. It all feels so good and Gamzee has to forcibly press a hand to his hip to keep him from trying to shove his dick down his throat. A hand finds a way to his base and then Tavros is really kicking, tossing his head back as he’s mumbling Gamzee’s name. His eyes are squeezed painfully shut, sweat dripping from his brow and knuckles going white as he tugs on black handfuls of hair.

_“I’m just so sick of this, Gamzee!” Tavros screams, shoving the used needles off their coffee table as carefully as he can. “I’m so fucking sick of all of this; you aren’t even trying to get better!”_

_Gamzee doesn’t look at him angrily or with fear, just that stupid grin on his face as he trips out. “Tavros, what’s the haps? Hadn’t even motherfucking heard you come in.”_

_Tavros is angry, so very angry. Angry that he had to be the adult. Angry that his boyfriend couldn’t just sober up for a few fucking months. Angry that Gamzee kept stealing money from his wallet for drugs. Angry that they were going to lose their home because Gamzee just couldn’t get his shit together for long enough for them to get back afloat. He was angry and tired. “Get out.” His teeth grind together, eyes dark._

_Gamzee frowns at him, confused. It’s silent aside from the clock ticking on the counter, a steady rhythm that makes his head hurt worse. “What?” He whispers. More silence._

_Tavros walks back over to the door and harshly shoves it open. “Get the fuck out of our—my apartment, right now.” He stands there waiting. “Take your shit and leave.”_

_Grey-blue eyes stare at Tavros with the most hurt expression ever seen. “Tavbro. Tav.” He shakes his head, trying to get his thoughts together a little bit. “Tavros.” His voice is rough and so, so sorry. “Please.” Please, don’t make him go. He won’t fuck up again. He promises. He’s serious this time, please._

_”Gamzee.” He chokes out, trying to tear his eyes away. “I can’t anymore. I just can’t.” And he’s definitely crying, saline tears falling down his cheeks and slipping off his face to hit the cold hardwood floor. He hears a ruffle of noise and then feels lips at his neck, pressing soft, butterfly kisses. Tavros wants to shove him away and make him stop, leave his life and take all the pain with him, but he can’t. So, he lets shaky arms shove the door closed and push him back against it. Butterfly kisses turning into harsh, shuddering breaths against his skin. It’s warm when he’s practically frozen._

_He’s weak._

“God. Gamzee. Please.” He cries as Gamzee shoves into him, over and over. His legs  are wrapped around Gamzee’s upper chest, trying to find a way to get him deeper.

“Tavros, I love you.” It’s muttered into the crook of Tavros’s neck as he rocks his hips. “I love you so motherfucking much.”

He hates the fact he can’t say it back without lying. He can’t lie, so he doesn’t say anything, instead letting their moans and pants fill the room. God, he’s so stupid. Stuck in a rut of falling in love and hating him with every single part of his being. Tavros rakes his nails across his back until he can feel the skin break beneath them. Gamzee just groans, responding by biting down on Tavros’s shoulder as he speeds up. They find their rhythm, synched together, the clock ticking in the other room and Tavros can feel himself getting close. He knows all too well that warmth in his stomach and Gamzee’s pace is quickly becoming more erratic. It’s then, that Gamzee hits that spot deep and hard and his eyes are squeezing shut tighter as a wail tears from his lips. “Gamzee, I love you, too.” His mind is mistaking lust for love, but he doesn’t care.

The words spur Gamzee on and he positions himself to hit the same spot with hard thrusts. He presses kisses along Tavros’s chin and face, whispering something. “Marry me?”

Tavros comes with a sharp, high-pitched noise, cum splattering both their chests and his breath uneven. His entire body locks up, mouth freezing wide open as he rides out his orgasm.

Gamzee isn’t too far after, Tavros’s tightened muscles creating the perfect tightness around his dick. He has a few more fast thrusts, balls slapping against Tavros’s ass with an almost comedic sound before he shoots his load. The grip he had had on Tavros’s hip tightens so much, it’ll leave bruises. His wet hair falls forward, more drops of water falling. He feels legs unhook from around him and slowly he pulls out, tossing himself beside his boyfriend. His back is turned for a moment, before he rolls over to run his hands through Tavros’s tuft of hair.

Tavros turns his head a bit, breath still shaky as he takes in this side of Gamzee. The side that makes his heart swell and skip a beat and sometimes makes him forget to breathe because he’s just so fucking in love. This side of Gamzee’s that fragile and scared. This side that looks at him like he’s the best thing in the entire universe and he can’t help but want to keep him all to himself.

_“You know.” Gamzee starts, roar of the waves drowning out his voice ever so slightly. “If you asked me for the moon, I’d motherfucking get it, right now.”_

_Tavros laughs with the stars above their head, eyes trained on the red-gold sunset unfolding before them. “And how would you plan on doing that?”_

_Gamzee grins. “It’d be easy. I’d hijack one of those spaceships from NASA and push it all the way back to you. Leave that shit on our doorstep for you to find when you woke up.” He tosses a rock across the water and it skids a few paces before falling in with a silent plop._

_“You can’t push the moon, you big dork.” Tavros shoves him lightly with his shoulder before trying to toss a rock of his own. It doesn’t skid like he wants it to, just falls in._

_“I could if you wanted me to. All you’d have to do was ask.”_

_Tavros snorts. “Wouldn’t it be easier to go and get a document saying that I owned it. You know, leave it where it was, so we don’t all die of freak typhoons.”_

_Gamzee shakes his head at him and picks up a rock. He grabs Tav’s hand and forces them both to stand. Slowly he makes the motion to toss, guiding Tav’s hand through the motion. “Naw. Sometimes, you just got to motherfucking go for it.” They both let go and the rock skids across the water with ease until they can’t see it._

_Tavros lets out a cheer, watching to see if he could catch a final glimpse of it falling into the ocean. “That was great!” He doesn’t get a reply, so he looks over at Gamzee and oh._

_Gamzee looks up at him with a small, nervous half-smile. His knee is bent and there’s a clam shell in his hands._

_Tavros wants to comment on how corny it is and who is he, the Prince Eric to Tavros’s Ariel? But, the words die in his throat as he stares down at Gamzee. His lungs give out on him when Gamzee opens the shell to reveal a small, gold ring with diamonds in the band._

_“I know I’ve fucked up all throughout our relationship and you probably deserve someone way better, but fuck,” His eyes shine even though they’re squinting from the last rays of the sun. “Tavros.”_

Tavros stares at him.

“Please.”

  


**Author's Note:**

> A little prose-y at parts, sorry.
> 
> I get inspired when I hear music and this was supposed to be shorter, but it refused to work out like that.


End file.
